No news on the adoption front

So another week has come and gone. This was the 3rd week in October out of 4 1/2. Why am I keeping up? Because there is supposed to be a very special meeting sometime during this month of October. A meeting that will decide the fate of one child. And in our case, one can assume that no news, is not good news. 
I got anxious Wednesday night and did a whole USA search on AdoptUSkids.org. Not all states participate, but a lot do. I saw a few children that I would inquire about if we were "allowed". They are not in our state, and we have to wait 6 months after our home study was approved before we can attempt to transfer it to another state... we are only 3 months out. So I requested info from those states, of their requirements, etc. 

I kind of do, and kind of don't understand why your home study can only be active in one state at a time. You would think that they want to find these children the best home for them regardless of what state. And once adoption takes place would that not free up state money from that child to be able to put towards another?

I had a really sweet lady from the Baptist Children's Home email me back the next day. If I had the whole "home study" thing to do over again, I would definately go through our local United Methodist Children's Home. I found out way to late that they did home studies. They seemed to me like they cared more. I know that the state has the children's best interest in mind, but what about me? Who's looking out for me?

Looking forward

So there have been several things in the news lately that really bother me. One, being teen Amanda Todd, committing suicide after being bullied. That is just not right. What are people teaching their kids? Oh, wait, they are not "teaching" them! More children are being raised by grandparents and step parents, etc. than ever. More parents are wanting to be their kids 'friend' instead of parent. 
And two, is the 14 year old Pakistani girl, Malala Yousafzai, who spoke out against the Taliban and was shot for standing up for education for women. I stop and think more and more often 'where is this world going?' And then answer myself 'to Hell in a handbasket'. 

I wish I was able to protect children. I don't think any child should go with out feeling that kind of love, love of a parent. 

My goals for 2012? Well, I want to be a better friend. I want to be in a group or class of people my own age that talks openly about stuff, whether that be in a Sunday school setting or women's group, etc. I feel very left out sometimes. I know I am missing something in that area of fellowship. 
I want to be able to meet someone and introduce them to my son or daughter! But that is a goal that I may not be able to attain. 

So I'm just living day by day, trying to figure all this out. 

What's new... not a lot.

So what's been happening lately... um, really not much. 
I finally broke down and bought some St. John's Wort to help my crazy moods. Started taking that Sunday afternoon. So far I've had crazy dreams (which is normal for me), really energized Tuesday of cleaning, and a kind of normal blah Wednesday. I've also started back on gummy vitamins (Vitafusion Gummyvites).  

Really other than that, nothing of substance.